by Kylene Hamulak

 

The guys had their chance to make an impression, so this week American Idol is bringing the ladies to Hollywood! Rumor has it the girls are even stronger than the guys this year, but we hear that every year yet haven't had a female Idol since Jordin - in Season 6! Is it a girl's year to win? This is where it starts...

 

As the guys did last week, the ladies will will face two rounds: a sudden death a cappella audition and the group rounds, which is where I'm sure we can expect the bulk of the tears. Fingers crossed.

 

Notable Advances from Round One:

 

Angela Miller is great, but with the hand gesturing and the head and the...well, I'm just thinking that she's the kind of contestant I get annoyed with by the third show.

 

Victoria Acosta, the mariachi singer, is good, but I think she's lucky she sang early in the day...cause she wasn't good ENOUGH.

 

Rachel Hale (The Happiest Contestant) and Janelle Arthur (formerly known as Young Dolly Parton) are the country girls going head to head. Rachel, say Nicki and Keith, has something special, even beyond her terrific voice. Janelle's voice takes over the entire theater - yeah, these girls are going to be fun to watch.

 

Candice Glover has a HUGE voice. Huge. And so far doesn't make me want to throttle her through my tv. Watch this girl.

 

Isabelle is the girl who didn't have confidence. She also apparently doesn't have a last name. She's gorgeous and - again - she has a huge voice. I know I'm repeating myself here, but there's just no other way to describe it.

 

Kez Ban wanted 30 seconds to warm up her voice because she's getting over a cold and has been "hootin' and hollerin' all day." Her audition goes terribly, but she makes it through anyway. Great for entertainment value, but if Idol wants a singer, they better be careful how far they let her go.

 

 

Memorable Cuts in Round One:

 

Mariah Pulice, who you may remember her from the audition rounds as the girl who is battling anorexia. Or, if you're like me, you may not remember her because you got her confused with a girl who had a similar story on X Factor this year. Regardless, I was kind of surprised she didn't make it through.

 

Megan Miller was the girl on crutches who risked amputation for her Idol audition. Good thing she didn't lose her leg, cause she's going home. She'll probably need that limb.

 

 

Round Two: The infamous GROUP ROUNDS

 

With nearly half their number cut, 76 girls made it to group rounds, where, like the guys last week, the ladies learn their groups will be assigned to them. Shock value is gone for us at home, but the drama is just revving up for them!

 

HITS:

 

The Swaggettes (Melinda Ademi, Kamaria Ousley, Candice Glover, Denise Jackson) - The girls perform "Hit 'Em Up Style" after a drama-free group experience. They sound great, but I'm already sick of this song - I hope we don't have to hear it from too many groups. Keith says "You just all came out and did the thing." That they did, Keith. (All Advance)

 

Raisin' Cain (Morgan Leigh Boberg, Lauren Mink, Brandy Hotard) - It's a regular hoedown with this group's rendition of "Sin Wagon"! The judges seem impressed (you can tell, cause Nicki pulled out a Southern accent she learned from watching Hart of Dixie). "We are willin' to make you cupcakes, give you ice cream, paint your lil' toenails, and have you come back again. Y'all are goin' through!" says Nicki. (All Advanced)

 

Dolly Chicks (Kree Harrison, Britnee Kellogg, Brandy Neelly, Haley Davis) "We love each other! We're friends already!" Suuuure you are. That lasts until the panic sets in. One of the group members (to be honest, all of these girls look the same to me) has abandoned them to sleep instead. I think it's Haley. "Sin Wagon" actually starts out strong, and the first three girls are great...Haley (yep, she was the tired one) reads the lyrics off her arm. Awesome. Nicki's pissed off about it. "You don't just go to sleep and leave everyone else up to work and then stare at them the whole time...but, we'll vote."  In the end, Brandy is the only one cut, which is kind of confusing - she was better than some of the other advancees tonight, and her positive attitude makes me believe we haven't heard the last of her. (Kree, Britnee, and Haley Advance; Brandy is cut)

 

 

The Misfits (Kez Ban, Breanna Steer, Angela Miller, Janell Arther) Before things really get moving, we're given a glimpse of what to expect. Kez Ban "will fight to the DEATH" for California Dreamin', but her group mates aren't as enamored with the choice. They deliberate as Kez keeps repeating "California dreeeeeamaaaaaan" and dances like her feet don't work. Ultimately they agree on "Be My Baby" (Kez Ban: "I get to sing a song that doesn't make me want to vomit!") but that's about the last thing they agree on. Rehearsals aren't going well, and when Kez Ban goes to dinner, the other girls agree to meet to rehearse without her. The group pulls it out for their performance and Nicki calls it "perfection." She tells Janell she's a star, and says all four are special, declaring them the best group of the day. (All Advance)

 

MISSES

 

Almost Famous (Savannah Votion, Lizz Weis, Daysia Hall, J'Leigh Chauvin) - The girls are performing "Somebody That I Used to Know" when they realize that only one of them ever knew how to arrange music (Savannah), and when they get onstage, that's the least of their problems. They should've changed it to "Some Lyrics That I Used To Know". Nicki wonders if it was the remix. Ha. Daysia is the only one who advances, despite forgetting her words. Savannah is pissed and ready to go. Oh, and she's never coming back on the show. (Daysia Advances; All Others Cut)

 

Urban Hue (Jett Hermano, Seretha Guinn, Tenna Torres, Kiara Lanier) - "American Boy" doesn't go too great for this group. "Is it finished?" Keith asks. "I hope so," replies Nicki. Me too, Ms. Minaj. It's not a unanimous decision, yet all but Seretha advance, but...wow.

 

Handsome Women (Shira Gavrielov, Alisha Dixon, Liz Bills, Courtney Calle) - Liz doesn't feel like they've done enough work on their song, while her group is complaining that they can never find her. Their performance of "Somebody That I Used to Know" is...rough. It feels like an early audition montage of singers who butchered this song. Shira could be an SNL skit, I'm really not even sure if she's real. Liz is the only one to advance, but damn it if Shira didn't try to get another chance. She's the Israeli one-hit-wonder, remember. I mean, it doesn't have any relevance, I just wanted to remind you of that. The judges take turns telling her she sucks. "You may think that you were incredible," says Randy, "but the four of us didn't feel that." Translation: Our ears work...yours apparently don't.

 

 

HIGHLIGHTS:

 

Hyperbole Much? With every commercial break, Ryan is promising the most SOMETHING we've ever seen - most talent, most drama, most annoying transition by Ryan Seacrest. We get it, Ryan. This is year is MORE BETTER than any other season.

 

Understatement of the Year: Kez Ban informs us, "I don't think I fit in well ANYWHERE."

 

Understatement of the Year - Part 2: Kez Ban informs us, "I sometimes say very very stupid things in the moment." For example: "Do we need a back massage circle?"

 

Most Appropriate Group Name: Perhaps never has there been a more appropriate name for a group than The Dramatics (Kriss Mincey, Janel Stinney, Cristabel Clack, a Fourth Girl I Didn't Catch), singing "If I Die Young". Cristabel claims it started out really well before Janel is literally making herself sick. She's on the floor, she's crying, she's...you know, crazy? When asked what the group has been like for her, Janel informs us that she's actually SOLO artist (thanks for clearing that up) but working with the group has helped teach her how to work with others. (Which apparently means either hanging with your mom or sitting by yourself in a corner.) Did anyone translate Janel's runs during the performance to see if she even sang any of the words? Because I didn't catch any lyrics. It's ok though, cause Nicki said she felt it. "Wow," says Keith. "I had almost a complete opposite reaction to that song." Janel tearfully says sometimes she feels like she doesn't fit in - can we introduce her to Kez Ban? Maybe they can create a colony. Somehow Nicki loves this about her - she thinks it's endearing. "You didn't sing one word, and you kept me engaged because of that." Wait, WHAT? Cool. Go on Idol, don't sing words, you're through! (All Advance)

 

 

Submitted For Your Approval: If Shubha Vedula continues to advance after tomorrow, can we yell Shubha Duba DOOOO! everytime she does something awesome? Her group doesn't even get named, but she's through without them.

 

Worst Group Name: Pooh Snaps (Zoanette Johnson, Erin Christine, Lauren Bettes, Isabelle). Who decides to put the word POOH in your group name? Zoanette  (Remember Zonette? She yelled- a lot - I don't know how she's even here today) didn't initially get along with her group, but she opens "Knock On Wood" and doesn't sound AS bad as her audition, though I still don't quite get it. Overall, Nicki calls them "cool" and everyone except Lauren advances.

 

I Like Her Better Already: For You (Stephanie Schimel, Alex Delaney, Kalli Therinae, Holly Miller) changed their song just hours before their performance, from "Total Eclipse of the Heart" to "Somebody That I Used to Know," which is quickly becoming the song I never want to hear again. They write the lyrics on their hands...which doesn't even work because they still (except for Holly) forget the words. Stephanie and Holly advance while their other two group members do not. Stephanie says, "Why did they let me through, I totally botched that," and I give her a couple of points for her honesty.

 

I Like Her, Too: As girls consulted their hand-written lyrics, Nicki held hers up too: "THEY SUCK." Well said.

 

Of course, not ALL the remaining girls suck, and I'm excited to see which ones survive their final solo auditions to make it to the Top 20 tomorrow. Just one more Idol hour stands between us and our Top 40 for Season 12!

 

Who was a standout for you tonight? Who do you think has the have the edge in this season of Idol - girls or guys? Let us know in the comments!

 

Catch American Idol every Wednesday and Thursday at 8/7C on Fox!

 

(Images courtesy of Fox)

 

Follow Kylene on Twitter @keepingupwithky!