It's Friday so just ease into the weekend and do me a favor. Go to this page http://www.facebook.com/pages/UnPhaZed/224892814610 Hit Like and say that I sent you and or say that your my fan. I will explain if you want. Anyway I have been casted in this and they are having one more audition Sat. afternoon if you are interested. Thank you and the best always, Keith
A hunter kills a deer and brings it home. He decides to clean and serve the venison for supper. He knows his kids are fussy eaters, and won't eat it if they know what it is - so he does not tell them. His little boy keeps asking him, "What's for supper?" "You'll see", says his dad. They start eating supper and his daughter keeps asking what they're eating. "Ok," says her dad, "here's a hint, its what your mother sometimes calls me." "We're eating asshole!!", she screams.
Sorry I haven't been on here in a while. Votes are in! PS- I was called to do the Mel Robbins show that I applied for on this website, and I aired on the show this morning : ) Thanks for the support!
Make it a point to do something every day that you don't want to do. This is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain. Have a wonderful Tuesday !!!
The queen of England was visiting one of Canada's top hospitals, and during her tour of the floors she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating.
"Oh my god!", said the Queen, "That's disgraceful, what is the meaning of this???"
The doctor leading the tour explains, "I'm sorry your ladyship, this man has a very serious condition where the testicles rapidly fill with semen. If he doesn't do that five times a day, they would explode and he would most likely die instantly."
"Oh, I am sorry" said the Queen.
On the next floor they passed a room where a young nurse was giving a patient a blow job.
"Oh my God", said the Queen, "What's happening in there?"
The Doctor replied, "Same problem, better health plan."
The true hypocrite is the one who ceases to perceive their deception, by taking votes and not giving in return because they are either lazy or jealous! Have a great Friday and a super safe weekend.
Hello, is this the FBI?"
"Yes. What do you want?"
"I'm calling to report about my neighbor Billy Bob Smith! He is hiding marijuana inside hollow pieces of his his firewood." "Thank you very much for the call, sir." The next day, the FBI agents descend on Billy Bob's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swore at Billy Bob and left... The phone rings at Billy Bob's house:
"Hey, Billy Bob! Did the FBI come?"
"Yeah!"
"Did they chop your firewood?"
"Yep."
"Happy Birthday, Buddy"
It is difficult to live in the present, ridiculous to live in the future, and impossible to live in the past. Nothing is as far away as one minute ago. Have a great Monday!
